Kim White recently passed away and she (and her family) has been on my mind every single day. I lost my dad to cancer almost 4 years ago and the feelings have been weighing on my heart as I think about the pain her family is currently going through. I know the feeling all too well and it's no good.
Kim was a light to all who knew her and were touched by her story. I had the privilege of hearing her speak at SALT and tell her story of battling cancer every single day. It was the most incredible thing I've ever listened to. She never forgot God. Not once did she give credit to anyone or anything else without first giving credit to God. God showed up for her. He showed up for her in many ways. It probably wasn't always the way she wanted or hoped or imagined he would... but he always did.
As I've been thinking about her this past week, I've been thinking a lot about the details in my life that God has been apart of. Where have I seen him? What has he shown up in or as? What details am I not paying attention to because I'm giving too much attention to details he's not in?
I am beyond grateful for Kim and her constant inspiration in my life. I remember right after she spoke I walked up to give her a hug and say thank you. I, of course, cried as I told her how happy I was that someone elses cancer story turned out differently than my dad's. I told her that it makes my heart so happy to see her still fighting and living and breathing. She gave me a big smile and said thank you. I do remember that as I was telling her this she was focused completely on me. She wasn't looking elsewhere or quickly waving hi to someone in passing. She gave me her attention... someone she didn't know a single thing about. She was probably in so much pain, and maybe very very tired but she didn't let it show.
That detail is how God showed up for me that day. He showed up for me as Kim. He showed up to tell me to look at the details. He gave me an inspiring reminder that he is aware of me and that he loves me. That no matter how many punches my life takes or how often I'm pushed to the ground... he is there with me. Every single time. I just need to look for him and thank him for showing up. Period.
I miss Kim's posts and seeing her fight so hard every single day. I will miss her dance parties and encouragement to just breathe and love life. I pray for her family every day as they mourn her and live through this difficult time. May we do our best to honor Kim and look for God in the details because he's there.
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